What St. Patrick can teach us about resilience and mental health

This is my first blog post for All of You Counselling and Psychotherapy, and I’ll be honest — the critical voice inside me made it hard to share this. That voice that whispers, “Is this good enough? It’s a familiar sound to many of us. Fear and self-doubt can keep us silent, but I realized as a psychotherapist, I couldn’t encourage others to face their fears if I wasn’t willing to do the same. So, here it is — a reflection on resilience, inspired by St. Patrick and dedicated to an old friend, Gary Myers, who suddenly and tragically lost his life last year. Gary had a deep love for all things Irish, he embodied a passion for Ireland, her history, her culture, and her music. I felt this was the best way I could honour his memory, by connecting one of our most well-known Irish stories with its relevance to mental health.

St. Patrick’s Day is often associated with parades, celebrations, and a shared sense of Irish pride — but beyond the festivities lies the story of a man who overcame profound hardship. St. Patrick’s journey from captivity to compassion holds timeless lessons that resonate deeply with the challenges many face today—especially when it comes to mental health.

As a psychotherapist, I understand that life’s struggles can feel overwhelming. However, if we take onboard some of the message from St. Patrick's story, we can see that resilience, purpose, and self-compassion can help guide us through even the darkest times. Here are three powerful lessons we can take from St. Patrick’s story to support our mental well-being.

1. Resilience in Adversity: Finding Strength When Life Feels Difficult

Imagine being sixteen years old—on the cusp of adulthood, your future stretching before you. One day, everything is familiar: the sound of your family’s voices, the warmth of home, the quiet certainty that tomorrow will come as planned. Then, in an instant, it’s all ripped away.

St. Patrick was just a teenager when he was kidnapped from his home in Wales by Irish raiders. It’s easy to romanticize history, but think for a moment about what this must have meant for him. The chaos of strangers storming into his village—was there violence? Was he torn from his family’s arms as they screamed for him to stay? In those terrifying hours, Patrick would not have known if he would live or die. All of his hopes and dreams—whatever they were at sixteen—likely vanished as he faced the unknown.

He was dragged across the sea to a foreign land, no longer a free boy with a future, but a slave condemned to hardship. Alone and afraid, he spent six years in captivity, tending sheep in the harsh Irish countryside. No family to comfort him. No familiar voice to soothe his fears. Just the daily grind of survival and the heavy question that may haunt anyone who has their world suddenly taken from them: Will I ever be free again?

The Mental Health Connection:

While most of us will never endure the physical captivity that St. Patrick faced, many people know what it feels like to be emotionally trapped. Anxiety, depression, trauma, and grief can feel like invisible chains—limiting your life, distorting your sense of self, and making the future feel hopeless.

Yet, St. Patrick’s story didn’t end in captivity. In the midst of his isolation, he began to cultivate an inner strength that no one could take from him. Over time, he developed a sense of faith and resilience that became a foundation for his life’s work. And eventually, he escaped—returning not just to his homeland, but to himself.

Practical Strategies for Building Resilience:

• Focus on What You Can Control: When life feels overwhelming, it’s easy to be consumed by what’s out of your hands. Instead, ground yourself in small, meaningful actions—whether that’s establishing a daily routine, practicing self-care, or reaching out for help. Small actions create a sense of stability when everything else feels chaotic. They remind us that while we may not control the larger circumstances, we do have the power to shape our daily experience. You may find listening attentively to the words in Johnny Cash’s song "Get Rhythm" helpful, — a reminder that even in tough times, small shifts in attitude and action can lift your spirits.

  
  

  Self-Care Suggestions:

  • Take a walk in nature to clear your mind.

  • Practice deep breathing or meditation to ground yourself in the present moment.

  • Keep a journal to express your thoughts and feelings.

  • Schedule time for activities you enjoy, even when it feels difficult—whether it’s music, art, or connecting with loved ones.

Cultivate Self-Compassion: Like St. Patrick in his solitude, it’s easy to feel abandoned during tough times. Be kind to yourself—acknowledge your pain without judgment, and remember that healing takes time. Often, during adversity, an overly critical inner voice can grow louder—telling us we are weak, hopeless, or not doing enough. This voice can be mentally crippling, leaving us feeling stuck and unable to cope. By practicing self-compassion, we can quiet this inner critic and create space for kindness and understanding. A helpful exercise is to ask yourself: Would I speak to a friend this way if they were struggling? If the answer is no, consider offering yourself the same care and encouragement you would extend to someone you love. Being gentler with yourself during difficult times isn’t just comforting—it can empower you to navigate challenges with greater strength and resilience.

• Seek Support: You don’t have to face your struggles alone. Therapy offers a space where you can unpack your experiences, explore your emotions, and develop tools to move forward. Just as Patrick eventually found his way home, there is a path to freedom from emotional suffering.

• Counselling Services: All of You Counselling & Psychotherapy offers a range of services to help support you. Feel free to reach out and get in touch - allofyoutherapies@gmail.com

• Helplines: In Ireland, services like Samaritans (116 123) provide 24/7 confidential support for anyone in distress.

• Community Support: Reach out to a trusted friend, family member, or local mental health service. Sharing your feelings with someone who cares can lighten the emotional load.

2. "Turning Fear into Freedom: Lessons from St. Patrick’s Return"

After escaping captivity and returning home, St. Patrick could have chosen to leave his painful past behind. Instead, he did something extraordinary—he went back to Ireland. Imagine the courage this must have taken. He wasn’t simply returning to a land where he had suffered; he was confronting the very place where he had felt powerless and afraid.

When we allow our fears to fester, they grow stronger. Left unchecked, they can shape our decisions and limit our lives. But when we confront those fears—whether they involve past trauma, future uncertainty, or self-doubt—we begin to take back the power they hold over us. St. Patrick’s return to Ireland is a reminder that facing what frightens us can often take a profound act of bravery but can lead to life-changing rewards for you and the people close to you.

The Mental Health Connection:

Fear can quietly control our lives when left unchallenged. It can prevent us from seeking help, having honest conversations, or stepping outside our comfort zones. But when we engage with our fears directly, we shrink their influence and regain a sense of agency.

A powerful resource on this topic is Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning. Frankl, a psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor, writes about how finding meaning in our lives can help us endure even the most profound suffering. Without meaning, we can feel lost and adrift—struggling to find purpose and direction. But when we cultivate meaning, it becomes a wellspring of resilience.

Lessons from Frankl’s Work:

• Meaning Gives Us Strength: Even in the most difficult circumstances, having a sense of purpose helps us to persevere. For St. Patrick, his return to Ireland was fuelled by a deep belief that his work mattered. Similarly, identifying what gives your life meaning—whether it’s relationships, creativity, or contributing to others—can provide a powerful anchor during tough times.

• Suffering Without Meaning Feels Unbearable: When life feels empty or meaningless, pain becomes harder to endure. If you’re struggling to find meaning, start by reflecting on what you value most and how you might align your life with those values.

• You Can Choose Your Response: Frankl emphasizes that while we cannot always control what happens to us, we can control how we respond. This echoes Patrick’s story—he could not change his past, but he chose how he would engage with it moving forward.

Practical Strategies for Facing Fear and Finding Meaning:

• Identify a fear that feels overwhelming and break it into smaller, manageable steps.

• Reflect on what gives your life meaning—what brings you joy, connection, or a sense of purpose?

• Engage with resources like Man’s Search for Meaning to deepen your understanding of how purpose can shape your mental well-being.

• Consider seeking professional support to navigate fears that feel too heavy to face alone.

By meeting your fears head-on and nurturing a sense of meaning in your life, you reclaim your power and open the door to healing and growth.

3. "Embracing Change: How to Navigate Life’s Difficult Transitions"

Life is full of transitions—some expected, others sudden. St. Patrick experienced many profound shifts in his life: from freedom to captivity, from isolation to leadership, and from exile to returning home. These transitions must have been deeply unsettling, but they also shaped his growth and resilience.

Many of us experience difficult transitions, whether it’s the loss of a loved one, a career change, moving to a new place, the end of a relationship, or even the struggles of adjusting to a new phase in life. Change can bring uncertainty, grief, and fear, but learning how to navigate it can help us emerge stronger and more grounded.

Ways to Cope with Difficult Transitions:

• Acknowledge Your Feelings: Change often brings a wave of emotions—sadness, anxiety, frustration, or even relief. Suppressing these feelings can make the transition even harder. Instead, allow yourself to process them. Psychotherapy can be incredibly helpful in this process, providing a space to explore and make sense of your emotions in a healthy way. Talking through difficult transitions with a therapist can offer clarity and validation, helping you move forward with greater confidence.

• Stay Present: When faced with uncertainty, it’s easy to get lost in worry about the future or regret about the past. Practicing mindfulness—focusing on the present moment—can reduce anxiety and improve your ability to cope. Physical exercise is another powerful tool; movement, whether it’s a walk, yoga, or a full workout, can ground you in the here and now, release built-up tension, and boost mood-enhancing endorphins.

• Ask for Help: Many people assume that psychotherapy is only for those in crisis, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Therapy is not just for moments of deep distress; it is a valuable resource for navigating life’s changes, no matter how big or small they may seem. Seeking support when facing a transition—whether it’s a job change, becoming a parent, or entering retirement—can help you adapt with greater ease. Having someone to listen, guide, and support you can make all the difference in how you process and respond to change.

Difficult transitions, like those St. Patrick faced, have the power to reshape us. While they often come with struggle, they can also be opportunities for growth, self-discovery, and transformation. With the right support and coping strategies, you can navigate life’s changes with resilience and confidence.

"Remembering Gary Myers: A Heart That Always Led Him Home"

This post is dedicated to the memory of Gary Myers. Gary was an old friend from school—a teammate on the football field and someone I was meant to travel to America with in the hope of earning a soccer scholarship. On the morning of our flight, Gary could not board the plane. His bond with his family was so strong that the thought of being so far away from them was too much at 18 years of age. I remember his face when he told me the news. I was devastated not to have him by my side, but even at that tender age I knew there would be no talking him into leaving home, and why would he? He was deeply loved by all his family and friends, this was his home. His love of home didn’t end at his front door. Gary had a deep passion for Ireland—her history, her culture, and her music. He loved Celtic Football Club and came alive listening to his favourite bands, The Wolfe Tones and Oasis. (We both loved The Wolfe Tones, though we had some spirited debates about Oasis!). I felt it appropriate to try and write something which gave a nod to Gary's love for our Irish traditions, so no better day to send this out into the world than our national day of celebrating all things Irish, St Patricks Day. Go raibh maith agat as an saol a chaith tu linn (Thank you for the life you shared with us). I hope you are back in the warm embrace of your parents, Gary and that you find peace there.

To the family and friends Gary left behind—I want you to know I’ve been thinking about the devastation you’ve been going through. I can see how much you miss him through the stories you tell and some of the things that you do to keep him close. I hope you can continue to support and be there for each other, its what Myers, R Kid would have wanted for you. Ar scáth a chéile a mhaireann na daoine – In the shelter of each other, people survive.